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Offensive Business Cards

Offensive Business Cards
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Tell people how you really feel while keeping things professional with these offensive business cards. With everything from telling people they suck at parking, to their body odor, and even their poor choice of tattoos, there’s an offensive business card for any occasion.

Tell people how you really feel while keeping things professional with these offensive business cards. With everything from telling people they suck at parking, to their body odor, and even their poor choice of tattoos, there’s an offensive business card for any occasion.

$19.99

Tactical Self Defense Pen

Tactical Self Defense Pen
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Be prepared for anything the world throws your way with the tactical self defense pen in your pocket. Apart from its patented waterproof ink, the pen features a glass breaker, handcuff key, and even a self defense tool that collects an attacker’s DNA sample.

Be prepared for anything the world throws your way with the tactical self defense pen in your pocket. Apart from its patented waterproof ink, the pen features a glass breaker, handcuff key, and even a self defense tool that collects an attacker’s DNA sample.

$15.45

Emergency Water Container

Emergency Water Container
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No doomsday prepper should be without this emergency water container. When disaster strikes, you’ll have 100 gallons of fresh water to store in your bathtub that will last you up to four weeks. Now the only problem you’ll have is dealing with the collapse of civilization.

No doomsday prepper should be without this emergency water container. When disaster strikes, you’ll have 100 gallons of fresh water to store in your bathtub that will last you up to four weeks. Now the only problem you’ll have is dealing with the collapse of civilization.

$34.95

USB Rocket Launcher

USB Rocket Launcher
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Command the deadliest artillery in the entire cubicle block when you equip your workstation with the USB rocket launcher. Next time your boss approaches you, this entertaining high-tech gadget will make him think twice about asking for those T.P.S. reports.

Command the deadliest artillery in the entire cubicle block when you equip your workstation with the USB rocket launcher. Next time your boss approaches you, this entertaining high-tech gadget will make him think twice about asking for those T.P.S. reports.

$29.99

Hair Growing Helmet

Hair Growing Helmet
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Toss out that bottle of Rogaine, because Science™ and lasers have teamed up to create an infallible technique to re-grow your hair and stop balding at the source! Just put the hair growing helmet on, don’t ask questions, and let the lasers take care of the rest.

Toss out that bottle of Rogaine, because Science™ and lasers have teamed up to create an infallible technique to re-grow your hair and stop balding at the source! Just put the hair growing helmet on, don’t ask questions, and let the lasers take care of the rest.

$799.99

Tentsile Hanging Camp Tent

Tentsile Hanging Camp Tent
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Elevate your camping experience with Tentsile tree tents and camp comfortably above any ground conditions. These tents offer the comfort of a hammock, the security of a tent, and a complete new way to experience the great outdoors.

Elevate your camping experience with Tentsile tree tents and camp comfortably above any ground conditions. These tents offer the comfort of a hammock, the security of a tent, and a complete new way to experience the great outdoors.

$399

True Reflection Mirror

True Reflection Mirror
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As strange as it sounds, we will never be able to see our actual reflection, unless we’re in possession of the true reflection mirror. The only kind in the word, the mirror shows things as they actually are without reversing the left and right sides.

As strange as it sounds, we will never be able to see our actual reflection, unless we’re in possession of the true reflection mirror. The only kind in the word, the mirror shows things as they actually are without reversing the left and right sides.

$200

Strength Augmenting Flicking Device

Strength Augmenting Flicking Device
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Turn your hands into lethal weapons by strapping on this strength augmenting flicking device. Apart from unique, this quirky device is extremely versatile since it can be used to as a finger exerciser, a self defense weapon, and even to open your beer bottle.

Turn your hands into lethal weapons by strapping on this strength augmenting flicking device. Apart from unique, this quirky device is extremely versatile since it can be used to as a finger exerciser, a self defense weapon, and even to open your beer bottle.

$21.99

Tri-Edged Spearhead

Tri-Edged Spearhead
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The tri-edged survival spearhead could mean the difference between life and death when you’re out in the wild. This handy survival tool and bugout bag essential is made from stainless steel, measures 9″ long, and comes with a paracord handle .

The tri-edged survival spearhead could mean the difference between life and death when you’re out in the wild. This handy survival tool and bugout bag essential is made from stainless steel, measures 9″ long, and comes with a paracord handle .

$20.98

OneTigris Trauma Bag

OneTigris Trauma Bag
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The OneTigris trauma bag is the indispensable pouch that will allow you to access important first aid equipment on-the-fly when you’re out in the field. It features a quick access pull handle design along with snag-free zippers for easy access.

The OneTigris trauma bag is the indispensable pouch that will allow you to access important first aid equipment on-the-fly when you’re out in the field. It features a quick access pull handle design along with snag-free zippers for easy access.

$23.98

World’s Toughest Ultralight Survival Tent

World’s Toughest Ultralight Survival Tent
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Don’t venture into the great outdoors without the world’s toughest ultralight survival tent! This reusable windproof and waterproof shelter is made from a tear-resistant, extra-thick HeatFlex Mylar that reflects heat outward or inward – making it ideal for both hot and cold climates.

Don’t venture into the great outdoors without the world’s toughest ultralight survival tent! This reusable windproof and waterproof shelter is made from a tear-resistant, extra-thick HeatFlex Mylar that reflects heat outward or inward – making it ideal for both hot and cold climates.

$19.95

CRKT Provoke EDC Knife

CRKT Provoke EDC Knife
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The CRKT Provoke is the marvelously design EDC knife that allows you to single-handedly deploy the blade in record time. This trusty knife boasts a razor sharp D2 steel blade with a titanium nitride finish for superior corrosion resistance.

The CRKT Provoke is the marvelously design EDC knife that allows you to single-handedly deploy the blade in record time. This trusty knife boasts a razor sharp D2 steel blade with a titanium nitride finish for superior corrosion resistance.

$161.95

The Long Distance Travel Pillow

The Long Distance Travel Pillow
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When you’re serious about getting quality sleep on the plane, look no further than this long distance travel pillow. Its unique design lets you sleep in total comfort by keeping your head, neck, and spine aligned while also concealing your face.

When you’re serious about getting quality sleep on the plane, look no further than this long distance travel pillow. Its unique design lets you sleep in total comfort by keeping your head, neck, and spine aligned while also concealing your face.

$69.94

Hammer Handle Pocket Slingshot

Hammer Handle Pocket Slingshot
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Shoot further and more accurately than ever before by decimating your target with the hammer handle pocket slingshot. The clever design combines the firing speed of the pocket slingshot with the control and precision of a traditional slingshot so you always hit your mark.

Shoot further and more accurately than ever before by decimating your target with the hammer handle pocket slingshot. The clever design combines the firing speed of the pocket slingshot with the control and precision of a traditional slingshot so you always hit your mark.

$99.99

Destruct Hard Drive Data Eraser

Destruct Hard Drive Data Eraser
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Ensure your data is permanently wiped off with the Destruct hard drive data eraser. Compatible with all Windows OS, this military-grade device will ensure your data is gone for good – just plug it into a USB port, boot up your PC, and select the hard disc you want to erase.

Ensure your data is permanently wiped off with the Destruct hard drive data eraser. Compatible with all Windows OS, this military-grade device will ensure your data is gone for good – just plug it into a USB port, boot up your PC, and select the hard disc you want to erase.

$28.99

Goal Zero Solar Panels

Goal Zero Solar Panels
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Harnessing the power of the sun is easier than ever with these Goal Zero solar panels. Crafted from strong tempered glass, these monocrystalline solar panels are lightweight, weatherproof, and come with a handy kickstand so that you can place them at the ideal angle.

Harnessing the power of the sun is easier than ever with these Goal Zero solar panels. Crafted from strong tempered glass, these monocrystalline solar panels are lightweight, weatherproof, and come with a handy kickstand so that you can place them at the ideal angle.

$149.95

Picnic Table Briefcase

Picnic Table Briefcase
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Make your alfresco meals a more pleasant experience for everyone by bringing along this picnic table briefcase. It features a sturdy yet lightweight aluminum alloy frame that’s built to last, along with a high impact wooden top and seating for four.

Make your alfresco meals a more pleasant experience for everyone by bringing along this picnic table briefcase. It features a sturdy yet lightweight aluminum alloy frame that’s built to last, along with a high impact wooden top and seating for four.

$75.1

Bluetooth Sleeping Eye Mask Headphones

Bluetooth Sleeping Eye Mask Headphones
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Defeat your insomnia once and for all by enjoying a nice deep sleep aided by these Bluetooth sleeping eye mask headphones. They provide true HD high fidelity sound so that you can comfortably drift off with a pleasant soundtrack of your choosing.

Defeat your insomnia once and for all by enjoying a nice deep sleep aided by these Bluetooth sleeping eye mask headphones. They provide true HD high fidelity sound so that you can comfortably drift off with a pleasant soundtrack of your choosing.

$21.99

Self Defense Pepper Spray Gun

Self Defense Pepper Spray Gun
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Walk with confidence knowing you’re armed with this self defense pepper spray gun. Weighing a mere twenty-eight grams, this lightweight spray gun allows you to quickly fire a steady stream of pepper spray to a distance of up to twenty feet away.

Walk with confidence knowing you’re armed with this self defense pepper spray gun. Weighing a mere twenty-eight grams, this lightweight spray gun allows you to quickly fire a steady stream of pepper spray to a distance of up to twenty feet away.

$44.99

Gerber Ghoststrike Fixed Blade Knife

Gerber Ghoststrike Fixed Blade Knife
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Ensure you’re never caught unprepared by keeping the Gerber Ghoststrike fixed blade knife handy. Expertly crafted from 420HC steel with a black ceramic coating, this American-made knife features a compact skeletal frame that can be discreetly carried.

Ensure you’re never caught unprepared by keeping the Gerber Ghoststrike fixed blade knife handy. Expertly crafted from 420HC steel with a black ceramic coating, this American-made knife features a compact skeletal frame that can be discreetly carried.

$59

MS18 100,000 Lumen Flashlight

MS18 100,000 Lumen Flashlight
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Vanquish the darkness with the MS18 100,000-lumen flashlight! This ultra-handy flashlight features eight different brightness settings, with a maximum output of 100,000-lumens. It also features an impressive lifespan of 50,000 hours.

Vanquish the darkness with the MS18 100,000-lumen flashlight! This ultra-handy flashlight features eight different brightness settings, with a maximum output of 100,000-lumens. It also features an impressive lifespan of 50,000 hours.

$669.95

Safe Nuke Tiny Tool

Safe Nuke Tiny Tool
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Safe Nuke is the tiny tool that allows you to touch public buttons, doorknobs, touchscreens, ATM screens, elevator buttons and many more without direct contact with your hands. It’s made out of naturally antimicrobial copper!

Safe Nuke is the tiny tool that allows you to touch public buttons, doorknobs, touchscreens, ATM screens, elevator buttons and many more without direct contact with your hands. It’s made out of naturally antimicrobial copper!

$23

Dango Tactical Wallet

Dango Tactical Wallet
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Get more use out of your everyday carry by placing your money and documents inside the Dango tactical wallet. It’s designed to house up to 12 cards and comes with a removable high carbon stainless steel multi-tool with over 14 built-in functions.

Get more use out of your everyday carry by placing your money and documents inside the Dango tactical wallet. It’s designed to house up to 12 cards and comes with a removable high carbon stainless steel multi-tool with over 14 built-in functions.

$89

Tough Tesla Lighter 2.0

Tough Tesla Lighter 2.0
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The Tough Tesla Lighter 2.0 is the ultimate lighter for any outdoor activity. This ultra-rugged rechargeable lighter will produce a steady flame with a push of a button in both windy and wet environments and can be used 300 times per charge.

The Tough Tesla Lighter 2.0 is the ultimate lighter for any outdoor activity. This ultra-rugged rechargeable lighter will produce a steady flame with a push of a button in both windy and wet environments and can be used 300 times per charge.

$26.93

Spring Loaded Glitter Bomb

Spring Loaded Glitter Bomb
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Exact revenge in the most glorious way imaginable by bathing your enemy in glitter using the spring loaded glitter bomb. Designed to look like a standard postal package, it comes with a built in spring mechanism that violently shoots glitter everywhere upon opening.

Exact revenge in the most glorious way imaginable by bathing your enemy in glitter using the spring loaded glitter bomb. Designed to look like a standard postal package, it comes with a built in spring mechanism that violently shoots glitter everywhere upon opening.

$28.99

10-in-1 Emergency Survival Gear Kit

10-in-1 Emergency Survival Gear Kit
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Keep an ace up your sleeve in the event the unthinkable occurs by packing this 10-in-1 emergency survival gear kit. This compact kit houses a multitude of must-have tools for survival like a flint stone, a compass, a multi-function knife and much more.

Keep an ace up your sleeve in the event the unthinkable occurs by packing this 10-in-1 emergency survival gear kit. This compact kit houses a multitude of must-have tools for survival like a flint stone, a compass, a multi-function knife and much more.

$19.99

Bose Open-Ear Audio & AR Sunglasses

Bose Open-Ear Audio & AR Sunglasses
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Ditch your headphones and enjoy your tunes in style by listening to them on the Bose open-ear audio and AR sunglasses. These stylish high-tech shades come with built-in Bose speakers that’ll produce rich, immersive sound without broadcasting it to others nearby.

Ditch your headphones and enjoy your tunes in style by listening to them on the Bose open-ear audio and AR sunglasses. These stylish high-tech shades come with built-in Bose speakers that’ll produce rich, immersive sound without broadcasting it to others nearby.

$199

Medieval Armor Set

Medieval Armor Set
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Bring chivalry back to the twenty-first century by protecting your family’s honor while dressed in the medieval armor set.  This wearable costume covers your entire head and torso in distinguished stainless steel plates to protect you in the heat of battle.

Bring chivalry back to the twenty-first century by protecting your family’s honor while dressed in the medieval armor set.  This wearable costume covers your entire head and torso in distinguished stainless steel plates to protect you in the heat of battle.

$2999

Levitating Surround Sound Speaker

Levitating Surround Sound Speaker
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This sleek levitating surround sound speaker adds instant ambiance in more ways than one. This Bluetooth speaker will not only provide rich, crisp sound but also some quaint ambient lighting. It’ll be a sure-fire conversation piece with all your guests.

This sleek levitating surround sound speaker adds instant ambiance in more ways than one. This Bluetooth speaker will not only provide rich, crisp sound but also some quaint ambient lighting. It’ll be a sure-fire conversation piece with all your guests.

$78.99

Fire Extinguisher Mini Bar

Fire Extinguisher Mini Bar
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Put out the fire burning deep inside with maximum efficiency by busting open this fire extinguisher mini bar. This hand crafted gem of a mini bar comes with enough room for a bottle of your favorite spirit, a couple of glasses, and even some additional bar tools.

Put out the fire burning deep inside with maximum efficiency by busting open this fire extinguisher mini bar. This hand crafted gem of a mini bar comes with enough room for a bottle of your favorite spirit, a couple of glasses, and even some additional bar tools.

$199

Indestructible Kevlar Charging Cable

Indestructible Kevlar Charging Cable
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Say goodbye to frayed cables once and for all by charging your devices using this indestructible kevlar cable. Compatible with both Apple and Android devices, the cable is reinforced by kevlar and is designed to be tangle resistant.

Say goodbye to frayed cables once and for all by charging your devices using this indestructible kevlar cable. Compatible with both Apple and Android devices, the cable is reinforced by kevlar and is designed to be tangle resistant.

$7.99

Ultra Portable Sleeping Bag

Ultra Portable Sleeping Bag
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Turn any location you visit into an impromptu campsite with the ultra portable sleeping bag. Apart from being lightweight, the sleeping bag features a unique design that allows it to be bundled into a packet small enough to fit in the palm of your hand.

Turn any location you visit into an impromptu campsite with the ultra portable sleeping bag. Apart from being lightweight, the sleeping bag features a unique design that allows it to be bundled into a packet small enough to fit in the palm of your hand.

$25.99